Two Ss

After praying Isya', I ponder upon myself and try to think what makes me like what I am today. Sometimes it seems to me that I'm not happy with myself or other things. In other occasion, I feel hopeless. Suddenly I realised that my heart is lacking of sakinah (bliss).

Why? I said to myself may be there is something wrong with the way I see myself or things around me. Then I tried to look things around me. My table, my books, my rack and my monitor. I have everything I need. Everything seems fine. In fact, I might be more well equipped than others. Then, what makes me unhappy and unproductive. I wonder what are the factors that makes me unsatisfied with myself?

Then I realised that I'm lacking in syukr and sabr. This two Ss are what I always overlook in life. Busy with life, makes me forget to thank Allah, and be patient with His test.

Allah gives me good eyesight so that I can enjoy seeing things around me, good health, and good living. This is indeed a great gift. How many people in this world are living in worse position than mine? This made me feel very humble in front of Him and I should be grateful to Him for all this nikmah He gives me. Realising this somehow made me feel content and happy again.

Besides that life is a test. Facing the tests, requires ones to be patient. Patience allows ones to have control on himself. Only those who has patience will be successful in life. Oh Allah, how far I am from being patient while facing Your test.

Alhamdulillah. What a feeling. I feel very happy to find the answer. May I will always remember to be patient and grateful to Him in the real sense.